You're What?
Pregnancy without the polished version: what changes, what it costs, what labor can look like, how newborns work, and how to keep yourself intact.
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Chapters
11 total- 01Prologue
- 02Chapter One - You're What?
- 03Chapter Two - What Now?
- 04Chapter Three - How Much Is This Gonna Cost Me?
- 05Chapter Four - Wait, What’s Actually Going to Happen to My Body?
- 06Chapter Five - Am I Gonna Sh*t Myself Giving Birth?
- 07Chapter Six - What the F*ck Do I Do With a Baby?
- 08Chapter Seven - I’m Too Young for This Sh*t
- 09Chapter Eight - What If My Partner’s a Moron?
- 10Chapter Nine - How to Not Lose Yourself in the Chaos
- 11Chapter Ten - The Realest Advice No One Ever Tells You
Edition notes and short pages
You're What?
You're What?
The Survival Guide to Pregnancy, Babies, and What the Hell Happens Now
by James Johnson
Dedication
To anyone who's ever stared at two pink lines and thought, "Oh, sh*t."
You're not alone.
You're not broken.
You're about to do something amazing, even if it feels like a mess.
This one’s for you.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
TO EVERY PARENT, young or old, planned or surprised, tired or terrified, thank you for showing up.
To my sister, for the spark behind this book. You’re gonna be an amazing mom someday.
To the readers, thanks for trusting this book to walk with you through one of life’s biggest plot twists.
I hope it made you laugh, breathe, and believe a little more in yourself.
And to the kid reading this years from now?
You were always loved, even before you were born.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
JJ IS A storyteller, observer of chaos, and low-key expert at making hard things feel a little more human. With a knack for breaking down the overwhelming and finding clarity in the noise, he writes books that feel like a conversation with your smartest, funniest, most honest friend.
When not writing, he’s probably daydreaming about metaphysics, overanalyzing a movie, or drinking too much Diet Coke.
COPYRIGHT
© 2025 JJ. ALL rights reserved.
This book is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical, legal, or therapeutic advice. Always consult with your doctor, midwife, or licensed professional for decisions related to pregnancy, health, and parenting.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations used in reviews and articles.