Chapter Forty-Six - What I Told Our Kids About Love

CHAPTER FORTY-SIX

What I Told Our Kids About Love

I DIDN’T GIVE them a speech.
Not all at once.

Love isn’t something you sit down and define like a vocabulary word.
It’s something you live into, day by messy, beautiful day.

But they saw it.
And when they asked, really asked, I told them this:

Love is not the butterflies.
That’s adrenaline. That’s chemistry. That’s nice, but it’s not the root.

Love is the choice.
The stay.
The small moment in the middle of chaos where you say, "I see you. I'm still here."

I told them love is when their mom would wake up before sunrise to pack lunches
but still laughed at my stupid jokes when I walked into the kitchen.

Love is when we fought and she walked away mad but came back anyway.

Love is when I messed up, and she didn’t make me feel like I had to beg to be forgiven.
Just… meet her in the honesty.

I told them love isn’t loud all the time.
It’s not always roses and poems and grand gestures.

Sometimes it’s doing the dishes so the other one can breathe. Sometimes it’s picking up their favorite snack without being asked. Sometimes it’s holding hands in the car when the day sucked. Sometimes it’s saying “I’m sorry” before pride gets the last word.

I told them that if they ever find someone who makes the ordinary feel sacred, that’s the one.

If they find someone who pushes them to grow without making them feel small, that’s the one.

If they feel safe falling apart in front of someone, and that person doesn’t try to fix them, just holds them, never let that go.

I told them love isn’t about possession.
It’s not “you complete me.”
It’s “we’re both whole, and we choose to build something bigger than ourselves.”

Love is adventure.
And boredom.
And showing up when it’s neither.

Love is funny.
And annoying.
And miraculous if you’re paying attention.

And when they asked me why I loved their mom so much, even after all these years, even through all the storms, I smiled.

And I said, "Because she never made me feel like I had to earn being loved. She just did."

And that?

That’s what I want them to remember when it’s their turn.

Because I didn’t just teach them how to love.

I showed them.